Over the weekend, I caught snippets of Monster Quest episodes I had missed. Well, chosen to miss. I'm saddened that such a young show has already run out of true MONSTERS (in all caps, it must be in all caps), and have resorted to, week after week, bringing us sewer rats, jelly fish, and stray dogs. The latter episode didn't even bait us with hollow promises of giant or otherwise mutated iterations of domestic canines. It was an episode about stray dogs. I felt the urge to check the channel. After all, I might have been on Animal Planet accidentally. Instead, I clicked the channel change button instead. They completely lost me with the altogether boring episode about something you'd see on the 6 o'clock news.
It makes me wonder what completely insipid episode will be coming up next. Squirrels?
"People all around the world have been spotting... SQUIRRELS. These ferocious beasts are prowling our forests, our parks, and even our own back yards. Some, like this woman, have reported squirrels as big as kittens and investigators are wondering if there aren't some out there as big as small cats..."
I can't believe they've already run out of bizarre, near-mythical creatures to profile. I mean, they did a Chupacabras episode once in Puerto Rico didn't even look into the Comecogollos or Jipia legends, which could have made for separate episode or at least a fuller Chupa one.
I can only say that if they insist on turning Monster Quest into Wild Kingdom, I'm not even going to bother to watch even the mini-marathons.